When the going gets tough...

So...my Grandmama has a saying posted on her fridge (or used to) that says, "When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping." I suppose that fits me most of the time though today, the tough going shopping was out of necessity rather than desparation to get away from home- though I'd have gone for that too. Last Thursday Jonathon and Jeff had a fever. Not really anything to be too concerned about, just a fever and no other real symptoms. I thought I could handle that. But it didn't GO AWAY! It just stayed and added a runny nose and irritability and a sore throat and aches and pains and a headache and coughing to it until finally it was some sort of full blown cold/ flu thingy. Of course they had to share. So Saturday I actually had all five children sick. Monday Brandon decided he felt left out. Now they are all sick and cranky and snotty and picky about food and they smell sick. (Did you ever have the sick smell?) Maybe that last one is just a weird thing that only I deal with. If so, just disregard that last statement and you can go on blissfully thinking I'm half sane and thus not completely gone...yet.

Ok, so I'm really glad the government hasn't banned a limit on things like Tylenol, Motrin, and Triaminic cause I think I've ended up purchasing about 6 bottles this week. With 5 kids on various combinations of the syrupy stuff around the clock for a week straight, I start wondering why they don't package that stuff in gallon containers instead. I mean, if I go through it as fast as milk, why can I buy the bulk version of Children's Tylenol, grape flavor.

I don't mean to seem too discouraged here. I do thank God EVERY morning when I get up. "Thank you that I'm not sick too!" Jonathon asked me yesterday, "what if we were all sick?" and I told him that was a nightmare I'd rather not ponder. Well, I didn't say it that way, but that was the general idea.

I think after taking care of them for 7 days straight I am starting to twitch everytime someone coughs. And tonight when one of them complained about having box mac and cheese for dinner (keep in mind that menus in our house for the last several days have contained dishes such as maple pecan salmon, roasted chicken with a fond de veau lie sauce, alfredo penne with fresh tomato and basil, Thai Chicken salad with peanut dressing, Grandma's corn casserole, biscuit and gravy for dessert, and a few pb&js) I actually think my head exploded and flew off my head in a million different pieces, each one finding it's own way to a crater on the moon, and I fell down dead, and twitched. Well, seriously, I lost it. It's not fun to find yourself in the position of treating your kids in a disrespectful way that you know you have to apologize for later, but I did. Both the treat unkindly and apologize parts. I think in the end all was well. That particular child and I had a full recovery from the incident, hugs and kisses all around and hopefully I can better keep my cool and he can better keep his mouth shut the next time. :-)

The other thing about sickness is that it makes people make disgusting noises. I've never been so grossed out at someone slurping snot, snorting coughing, hacking, gargling, sneezing, and what do you even call that noise where someone is breathing out and at the same time making some monstrous noise down in the way back of their throat bottom and then up comes that green stuff. I thought that was something like "hocking a lugi" but my vision of that activity is much more pleasant than the one I'm describing here. Anyway, it's gross and when you get it in surround sound and see the remnant of said activities hanging on the remnants of their faces and then you see them attempt to notice it's there by smearing it across both cheeks, up across one eye (which instantly bonds the eyelashes together better than any super glue) and into the hair and part of the ear, it gives me the super duper squirmy heebie jeebies. Let me go vomit...oh, wait, I'm not sick. AND I DON"T WANT TO BE! So children are gross, and must be held- always and must watch movies- always, and must never eat the food in front of them but be hungry every other second of the day- always. You know, James actually has consitently begged me for food and then holds it for a good hour before I threaten to take it away unless he eats it- twice, and then he takes a nibble. Arg!

Rachel is extra sick because she not only has all the body fluid issues, she also walks around with this plastered grin on her face saying (in a hoarse raspy voice, coughing), "I have a good attitude, Mama. I being good." *smile* She says it so much I can't always be happy that she is actually being good. It's particularly disgusting when she does it in the face of Jeff throwing himself down and wailing in the kitchen floor because I won't let him pour water out of the cup repeatedly or roll the toilet paper directly from the roll into the toilet!- all of it.

So, that's life right now. I think we have passed the climax of this issue, but I'll be glad when we can close the case completely, seal the box and put it on a high shelf in some nether region of the cellar to await some poor soul given the job of spring cleaning years from now when we don't live in this house any more.....

hmmm.....bedtime is calling.